confused

i am so confused. i told brian yesterday that i had fallen in love with josh and that i dont know whether or not i am still moving out by him. i still love him, but josh is here and he isnt. i realy wish that it would be easier than this. just a few weeks ago i told josh about brian. big mistake, it seems that hes a little more distant that he used to be. but thats expected, with having your g.f tell you that she is engaged to someone that lives five states away and that you are just a replacement until your old enough. thats pretty much what i told him. im just really scared that i might be making the wrong mistake with whoever i choose to stay with. i have one more year until i have to decide. if josh and i are still together at that time, i might stay. im judt not sure.
i just get talking to dustin again, and hes leaving in a few weeks, it fucking suz ass! i just that shit like this was easier to decide.